The Honesty Divide: Is Brutal Honesty Brave or Hysterical? Check Your Gender

None of these revelations [from men] of personal weakness seem to undercut the esteem in which these male critics are held. Nor has there been expressed an air of disappointment that they failed to live up to some bloodless, bileless ideal of who they are. Because stoicism is expected of men, their personal revelations — the more embarrassing the better — register as brave and honest. When women do it, they are merely confirming the worst suspicions about their gender. How, then, is a woman to write honestly of her experiences that do conform to gender expectations? If she is to maintain respect in public realms, must her public evocation of her private life be a lifelong performance? A series of lies, or at least omissions, constructed to leave an impression of unyielding strength and impenetrability?

To sum up: “….it’s time we grew up and realized that it is possible to exhibit both intellectual strength and personal weakness simultaneously.”

Amen.