I deleted all of my dating profiles last weekend. I was just finally done with the long parade of mediocre and often stressful first dates.
I invited the not-Boyfriend to the movies this weekend, but he’s seeing a very nice girl from Cincinnati these days, so he was booked out. Which is a good thing. We shouldn’t be hanging out anyway. There’s nothing stupider than spending time in a weird, unbalanced friendship.
I’m getting better about it, though. We don’t hang out anymore anyway. I think he’s just my default, “Gee, I’d like to spend time with that person!” person, and you know, there are better sorts of people who should be filling that roll. The feelings involved are a little too much like the ones in grade school when I was asking Adam Hopper to hang out. Sure, he liked me as a friend. But the liking was terribly unequal, and there’s no fun or future in that.
So I’m starting to get back to that place where I remember what being single and unattached is like. Hence the final deletion of said profiles. Want to go to Peru? Want to get a job in Canada or Paris or the Sudan? Want to spend all night watching MST3K and eating flourless peanut butter cookies? Want to spend an hour and a half at the gym and linger at the bookstore and pass some time at Chipotle? Stay up until 2am playing WoW? Sit up in bed and write on a work night?
It would be great to have a great boy buddy again to hang out with, but as yet, none has been forthcoming. Old boy buddies have girlfriends, folks I know at work have wives, and building new friendships is always really stressful for me.
So I’ll take some time off, then maybe go friend-searching as opposed to date-searching. Those searches are usually better investments anyway.
Kicking bad habits.
Yeah, I’m all over that.
In any case: seeing Wanted tomorrow!
